Karen Foley
Lynn Raye Harris
Ellen Hartman
Diana Holquist
Samantha Hunter
Shirley Jump
Dee Tenorio
Jeannie Watt
When Your Hair is on Fire, but Your Brain is Not . . .
So I woke up at three a.m. this morning convinced that I was wearing a bejeweled Venetian mask while giving birth to triplets who had a bright future as sibling serial killers.
Anyone want to doubt any longer that I am not always sane? LOL.
This dream was a perfect example of what happens when an author is desperately trying to write a book proposal while also dealing with Capital 'L' Life. It's what happens when that author realizes that she's turned 29 for the 11th time and is crazy enough to want a . . . gulp . . . baby . . . instead of just a 21st book.
This is a really personal thing to blog about, but it's clearly on my mind so I hope you'll bear with me, because apparently I'm not going to bear a child unless I go through a lot of scary steps at a fertility clinic. And even then it's not guaranteed.
Mr. Kendall is petrified of all this. He was fine with the concept of ONE baby. He figured he could manage a one-handed diaper change while still holding the T.V. remote in the other hand and his beer between his teeth, you know? What can I say--he's a very talented guy.
But Mr. Kendall is a bit freaked out by the possibility of having, say, quadruplets. Quadruplets who may all have to be changed/fed/bathed/taught to drive/put through college at the same time. I can't blame him. Can you?
I have to say that it freaks me out, too. We are at a serious Bump in the Road and who knows what will happen next. But in the meantime, my agent has e-mailed to say, "Doll? Just where the hell IS that proposal that I needed back in September so that we can try to go back to contract with your publisher?"
Oh, yeah. That. Well, I did have it written one way. But it wasn't working. And then all kinds of depressing things happened to sidetrack me from writing it the other way.
Which leaves me sitting here today, trying to conceive on two levels. Creatively and reproductively. And my brain is balking like a drunk mule. Who has stolen the Venetian mask in my book? Dunno. I'll have to think about it while I go pee on a stick . . .
And there you have it, folks. The glamorous life of a not-so-famous novelist. It's just like you've suspected all along: we're just like everyone else. Just as conflicted and confused and--holy cow! Do I really have a dozen people coming to my house for Thanksgiving, too?
Tonight I clearly will have a dream about a turkey wearing a Venetian mask in my oven while I sit on its eggs. Have a great Thanksgiving, everyone! All best, Karen
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Lots in the fire
so to speak, Karen! Hugs to you while you prep for Thanksgiving and while all sorts of stuff percolates for you personally and professionally. May it all work out in the best way possible for you and Mr. Kendall :)
And to be honest, even twins would be a bit much for me! I used to think I wanted twins because they would be so cute and they'd have a built-in buddy and all those other wonderful things, but the reality is that I would likely implode under the pressure of providing all that they need ;) That's just me though--we have friends with multiples and once they're past the first couple years (get lots of help, they advise), they're loving it!
Take care!
You guys, thanks for the support!
Your comments were all either heartwarming or made me laugh! Today I am working on filling both the holes in my synopsis and the ones in my bathroom wall (don't ask, I broke a mirror--brings good luck, right? Not bad. We really don't need any more bad, so I am officially sending that back out into the universe to peacefully and harmlessly disperse).
And the stick thing? Yeah, that's done for the day. LOL. Happy Thanksgiving, K
Karen Kendall
FIT TO BE TIED, March '07
MEN AT WORK, July '07
AN AFFAIR TO REMEMBER, October '07
www.KarenKendall.com
May everything work out for
May everything work out for the best in your life, both professionally and personally.
OMG...
Karen, you are a brave woman. I sit in awe. I wish you luck, and one healthy egg, no dividing! ;)
Even the prospect of having more than one would be enough to have me at the adoption lawyers office as an alternative, LOL. I wasn't a happy pregnant person in the first place, the idea of more than one in there freaks me out -- but for you, I wish you a speedy and happy result.
Man, and I get distracted from kitchen remodels and a big T-Day dinner looming...we also have a dozen coming, but you know, they'll leave on Sunday...not hang around for 18 years... ;)
Sam
lol
Let us know how the peeing on the stick goes. Rofl You really gave me a good laugh. It's just real life and it's nice to know that we're all in it together. Best of luck to you:)
LOL
Karen, I... well, I can't stop laughing enough to make an intelligent comment LOL.
Happy stick-peeing, I guess.
And hey, my brother raised twins (on his own, too). They are great kids, and once he got past the first year where they refused to sleep at the same time, it was much easier LOLOL.
Oh Karen!
Oh Karen! Boy did I need the laugh that you just gave me. I absolutely love you. Your dreams sound a lot like some of mine at times. It's good to know that I'm not alone in my unusual nightmares, brought on by everyday life.
I hope you and your family have a really great Thanksgiving. Hugs and Best Wishes, Mads:)
Oh my...
There are worse things than peeing on a stick, Karen. You could...miss the stick. lol Best of luck with, um, both your works-in-progress. Happy Thanksgiving.
HA
Very funny... I worked for 2 month is OB-GYN... very stressful thing... the stick!
Funny
A lot of delusion in the post - my psychiatry loving side is talking! - wanting a baby... who turns out to be triplets and a serial killer! That was intense... what a nightmare :)
Sounds like my dreams
Lots of times, especially during the stressful ones, I wake up from a nightmare and wonder where in the world that came from. What kind of stuff is floating around in my subconscious anyway? I have a really warped psyche sometimes. So you giving birth to triplets while wearing a bejeweled Venetian mask . . . it sounds normal to me. :-)
Good thoughts coming your way for success on both counts.